Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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