I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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