I'm laying in your front yard are you home
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
handjob tips. give me some.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
