Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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