I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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