We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize