O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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