so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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