If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Randomize
