Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
