whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
