I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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