their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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