Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
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Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
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I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
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