I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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