I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
