The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
