Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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