so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
