Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
