I think I just saw someone hide a body.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
