Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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