One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.