New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He better not be in your backpack
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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