if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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