I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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