I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Randomize
