Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
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