Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
