my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
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