Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
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