its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
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