It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize