so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
