I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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