My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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