I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
