She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
