Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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