K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
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