i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I think I am morally bankrupt
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
