your thong is hanging out like whoa
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Randomize
