I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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