id be glad to
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Randomize
