in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
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