smell my finger.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
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