Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
