my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Randomize
