So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Randomize
