my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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