You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
